How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
(Adobe EPUB eBook, Kindle Book, OverDrive Read)

Average Rating

5 star

(0)

4 star

(1)

3 star

(0)

2 star

(0)

1 star

(0)

Author:

David Richo

Published:

Shambhala 2002

Status:

Checked Out

Description

"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships—one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life: 1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships. 2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are. 3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament. 4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways. 5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control.When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation." David Richo, PhD, is a psychotherapist, teacher, writer, and workshop leader whose work emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness and loving-kindness in personal growth and emotional well-being. He is the author of numerous books, including How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara and San Francisco, California. ""Well-constructed and thought-provoking."—Spirituality & Health "An inspiring and highly practical guide to effective relationships."—Kathlyn Hendricks, coauthor of Conscious Loving and The Conscious Heart

Also in This Series

Formats

Adobe EPUB eBook

Works on all eReaders (except Kindles), desktop computers and mobile devices with reading apps installed.

Sample Sample Place Hold Adobe EPUB eBook

Kindle Book

Works on Kindles and devices with a Kindle app installed.

Sample Sample Place Hold Kindle Book

OverDrive Read

Sample Sample Place Hold OverDrive Read

Need Help?
If you are having problem transferring a title to your device, please fill out this support form or visit the library so we can help you to use our eBooks and eAudio Books.

OverDrive Product Record

images

cover:
thumbnail:
cover150Wide:
cover300Wide:

formats

mediaType

eBook

primaryCreator

role: Author
name: David Richo

title

How to Be an Adult in Relationships

dateAdded

2017-06-08T13:51:00-04:00

contentDetails

sortTitle

How to Be an Adult in Relationships The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

crossRefId

467560

subtitle

The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

id

87bfb05b-07fa-4e58-aa51-adf19c06ae9e

starRating

3.7

OverDrive MetaData

isPublicDomain

False

formats

keywords

creators

publishDate

2002-06-18T00:00:00-04:00

isOwnedByCollections

True

title

How to Be an Adult in Relationships

fullDescription

"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships—one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:
1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.
2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.
3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.
4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.
5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control.
When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation." David Richo, PhD, is a psychotherapist, teacher, writer, and workshop leader whose work emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness and loving-kindness in personal growth and emotional well-being. He is the author of numerous books, including How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara and San Francisco, California. ""Well-constructed and thought-provoking."—Spirituality & Health
"An inspiring and highly practical guide to effective relationships."—Kathlyn Hendricks, coauthor of Conscious Loving and The Conscious Heart

reviews

popularity

432

links

self:

id

87bfb05b-07fa-4e58-aa51-adf19c06ae9e

starRating

3.7

images

cover:
thumbnail:
cover150Wide:
cover300Wide:

isPublicPerformanceAllowed

False

languages

subjects

publishDateText

06/18/2002

mediaType

eBook

shortDescription

Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.

Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.

Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.

Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.

Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take...

sortTitle

How to Be an Adult in Relationships The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

crossRefId

467560

subtitle

The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

publisher

Shambhala

tableOfContents

Foreword xi
Acknowledgments xiii
Introduction 1

PART ONE: The Home We Leave 7

1. How It All Began 9
The Power of Mindfulness 13
A Positive Spin on How It Was and Is 18
The Five A's: The Keys that Open Us 26
Unconditional Presence versus the Five Mindsets of Ego 40
Practices: Our Skillful Means 42

2. Love and Less 52
Mirroring Love 52
When We Deny We Were Deprived 56
What Hurts Us Comforts Us 58
How Good for Me Was My Family? 61
Light on the Hurt 64
A Heroic Journey 69
Practices 70

PART TWO: Struggles Along the Way 79

3. Choosing a Partner 81
Am I Cut Out for Relationship? 82
Qualified Candidates 85
What Are We Up To? 86
Full Disclosure 89
Sexualizing Our Needs 93
Such Longings 97
Destiny Plays a Part 99
Practices 101

4. Romance: The First Phase of Relationship 106
Rising in Love 108
When Romance Is Addictive 112
What Love Feels Like 116
Practices 118

5. Conflicts 126
Working Things Out 128
The Past in the Present 133
Men and Women 136
Introvert or Extrovert? 138
Practices 141

6. Fears Rush In—and Dangers, Too 153
Engulfment and Abandonment 153
Learning from Our Fears 155
Jealousy 156
Infidelity 158
Dealing with Disappointment 161
Practices 165

7. Letting Go of Ego 174
Anatomy of the Arrogant Ego 177
Anatomy of the Impoverished Ego 181
The Riches of Ego and How to Find Them 183
A Yes to the Things We Cannot Change 184
Practices 187

8. When Relationships End 199
Ending with Grace and Moving On 201
When Somebody Leaves You 208

PART THREE: Returning the Blessing 215

9. Our Commitment and How It Deepens 217
The Virtues of Intimate Love 220
Commitment 226
Soul Mates 228
Practices 231

Epilogue 243
Appendix: The Steps and Shifts of Mindful Grief 246

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving(Adobe EPUB eBook, Kindle Book, OverDrive Read)

OverDrive Product Record

OverDrive MetaData

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
(Adobe EPUB eBook, Kindle Book, OverDrive Read)