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The gaslight effect: how to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life

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Are You Being Gaslighted?Check for these telltale signs: 1. You constantly second-guess yourself.2. You wonder, “Am I being too sensitive?” a dozen times a day.3. You wonder frequently if you are a “good enough” girlfriend/wife/employee/friend/daughter.4. You have trouble making simple decisions.5. You think twice before bringing up innocent topics of conversation.6. You frequently make excuses for your partner’s behavior to friends and family.7. Before your partner comes home from work, you run through a checklist in your head to anticipate anything you might have done wrong that day.8. You buy clothes for yourself, furnishings for your apartment, or other personal purchases thinking about what your partner would like instead of what would make you feel great. 9. You actually start to enjoy the constant criticism, because you think, “What doesn’t kill me will make me stronger.”10. You start speaking to your husband through his secretary so you don’t have to tell him things you’re afraid might upset him.11. You start lying to avoid the put-downs and reality twists.12. You feel as though you can’t do anything right.13. You frequently wonder if you’re good enough for your lover.14. Your kids start trying to protect you from being humiliated by your partner.15. You feel hopeless and joyless.Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time.Your boss backed you on a project when you met privately in his office, and you went full steam ahead. But at a large gathering of staff—including yours—he suddenly changes his tune and publicly criticizes your poor judgment. When you tell him your concerns for how this will affect your authority, he tells you that the project was ill-conceived and you’ll have to be more careful in the future. You begin to question your competence. Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, your friends, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back as your friends encourage you to do, you tell them that your mother is often right and that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism. If you think things like this can’t happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is when someone wants you to do what you know you shouldn’t and to believe the unbelieveable. It can happen to you and it probably already has.How do we know? If you consider answering “yes” to even one of the following questions, you’ve probably been gaslighted:Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse?When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world? Do you dread having small things go wrong at home—buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar? Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears—of being abandoned—and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works and tells you how to: Turn up your Gaslight Radar, so you know when a relationship is headed for...
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9780525633365
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Grouped Work ID073bc84a-d658-cc86-2d33-8d7dae691061
Grouping Titlegaslight effect how to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life
Grouping Authorrobin stern
Grouping Categorybook
Grouping LanguageEnglish (eng)
Last Grouping Update2021-02-27 02:28:01AM
Last Indexed2021-02-26 11:46:57AM
Novelist Primary ISBNnone

Solr Details

accelerated_reader_point_value0
accelerated_reader_reading_level0
auth_author2Wolf, Naomi.
authorRobin Stern
author2-roleWolf, Naomi.
author_displayStern, Robin
detailed_location_catalogRio Linda
display_descriptionAre You Being Gaslighted?
Check for these telltale signs:
1.
You constantly second-guess yourself.
2. You wonder, “Am I being too sensitive?” a dozen times a day.
3. You wonder frequently if you are a “good enough” girlfriend/wife/employee/friend/daughter.
4. You have trouble making simple decisions.
5. You think twice before bringing up innocent topics of conversation.
6. You frequently make excuses for your partner’s behavior to friends and family.
7. Before your partner comes home from work, you run through a checklist in your head to anticipate anything you might have done wrong that day.
8. You buy clothes for yourself, furnishings for your apartment, or other personal purchases thinking about what your partner would like instead of what would make you feel great.
9. You actually start to enjoy the constant criticism, because you think, “What doesn’t kill me will make me stronger.”
10. You start speaking to your husband through his secretary so you don’t have to tell him things you’re afraid might upset him.
11. You start lying to avoid the put-downs and reality twists.
12. You feel as though you can’t do anything right.
13. You frequently wonder if you’re good enough for your lover.
14. Your kids start trying to protect you from being humiliated by your partner.
15. You feel hopeless and joyless.
Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time.
Your boss backed you on a project when you met privately in his office, and you went full steam ahead. But at a large gathering of staff—including yours—he suddenly changes his tune and publicly criticizes your poor judgment. When you tell him your concerns for how this will affect your authority, he tells you that the project was ill-conceived and you’ll have to be more careful in the future. You begin to question your competence.
Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, your friends, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back as your friends encourage you to do, you tell them that your mother is often right and that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism.
If you think things like this can’t happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is when someone wants you to do what you know you shouldn’t and to believe the unbelieveable. It can happen to you and it probably already has.
How do we know? If you consider answering “yes” to even one of the following questions, you’ve probably been gaslighted:
Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse?
When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world?
Do you dread having small things go wrong at home—buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar?
Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears—of being abandoned—and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works and tells you how to: Turn up your Gaslight Radar, so you know when a relationship is headed for...
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subject_facetControl (Psychology)
Manipulative behavior
title_displayThe gaslight effect : how to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life
title_fullThe Gaslight Effect How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
The gaslight effect : how to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life / Dr. Robin Stern
title_shortThe gaslight effect
title_subhow to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life
topic_facetControl (Psychology)
Family & Relationships
Manipulative behavior
Nonfiction
Psychology
Self-Improvement